A Cup of Conversation, April 2014 – by Michael Kell

Words are powerful. Words hold the course of life and death, redemption and judgment. Words are the molecular building blocks of creation and human interaction. Words seal transactions, heal transgressions and are more potent than destiny, fate or chance because words alter intent and therefore direction. There is nothing more powerful than words except the tongue speaking the word and the heart giving it permission.

Have you noticed relationships are under assault? Texting and cryptic social media have unleashed an offensive on manners and self-restraint. When did we start to feel comfortable cyber-spitting words that cut so deep? Is it because we text and post words we’d never speak face to face? A generation ago, a wrong word spoken might have come back in the immediate form of palm to cheek or fist to nose. The ancient hand-written letter afforded us time to reconsider a word and exercise better judgment while on the way to the mailbox.

Written, spoken, texted or typed, we have all seen relationships devastated by words. The tongue betrays the heart every time whether in falsehood or in truth. This is a deeply spiritual precept and those who understand truth in this context, yet don’t practice its wisdom, suffer loss so great it can’t be quantified. We’ve all cut and bled along the relationship road and can testify the healing power of the sincere apologetic word is beyond human comprehension but chronic offending tongues choke to death on the words I am sorry, I was wrong, and please forgive me.

On the flip slide, a virtuous word can set course to better life. Working with troubled teens, I’ve seen both good fruit in the encouraging word and bitter fruit in the thoughtless word. The most painful memory sharing time with these kids was speaking a careless word of promise to connect for a day of fun with a boy who had little in his life except his fists. When the promised day escaped me the boy was left hanging on my broken word. Unbeknownst to me, he relapsed and acted out violently on a pack of kids who attempted to take his bike. The delinquents ended up in the E.R. and the boy in a juvenile detention camp. When I tried to contact him, the probation officer refused saying the boy lost trust in me. I broke my word and he’d enough of that in his life. That was a very painful word to hear. The careless word nullified the best of intentions. Months spent building trust was lost forever along with any potential good coming to his life through the relationship. My costly lesson was paid at the boy’s bitter expense but isn’t that always the way? Whether a parent’s lesson at the child’s expense, a husband’s lesson at wife’s expense or neighbor’s lesson at neighbor’s expense, it’s the words spoken or unspoken that determine the end of things or the beginning.

There are few things more appropriate than words to affirm affections of the heart. But be careful and know the words ‘I Love You’ or ‘I am Sorry’ require far more than a prompted inclination to speak them. There is no greater waste than empty words, especially those two sets of three. At the end of our days when all is reconciled, I believe there’s a moment we’ll see in a snap-shot the entirety of our words’ effect on this world along with good never harvested because of words spoken or unspoken. I think that is a loving, even prophetic word for all of us.

A word of healing was to be featured in this month’s edition but the words might be a little heavy for a small-town paper. This was a prudent word so a blog was started at www.wordperk.com for those interested in something a little…deeper. And that’s called an opportunistic word.

Be Good not bitter.